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  • Spiritual phonies.

    0 comments Published Nov 2, 23 PM
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    By Joslyn Hamilton

    This article was originally published on An Outside Eye in March 2010.

    I overheard a conversation at Spirit Rock last week that perfectly encapsulates what I hate about the world of spiritual phonies.

    As spoken by dude to a girl he just met: “You have cute energy, you know that?”

    Really? Cute energy? Do you maybe mean that she’s cute? Or that she has a cute personality? Or that she has a cute voice? Or a cute way about her?

    Or do you really mean that her energy is actually cute? What does that even mean? Are you talking about her aura? Why don’t you just go ahead and ask her what sign she is?

    JD Salinger would roll over in his grave.

    I am pretty sick of hearing about people’s energy and other people’s opinion of it. It’s such a copout of a way to describe someone. It reminds me, actually, of this amazing video by Taylor Mali that, if you haven’t ever watched, you should watch immediately:

    Like, You Know

    Wherein he makes fun of the way kids these days talk. And by “kids these days”, I mean us.

    In an effort to improve my level of articulation, I have gotten in the habit of playing back my voicemail messages before I go ahead and send them. It’s painful and interesting to hear your own voice. You realize how often you say the words “um”, “like”, and “wicked awesome.”

    However, I vow from this point forward never to use the word “energy” to refer to another human being’s vibe again. And for that matter, I won’t use the word “vibe” either.

    And that’s a declarative sentence for you.