The rise of the yoga butt
By Stewart Lawrence
There’s an old saying: “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” In theory, that same dictum should apply to the treatment of our bodies. But in today’s “do-it-yourself” yoga culture, many women, it seems, are eager to fix their bodies — even when they’re not in any way broken.
Indeed, more than a few have taken to this task with true vengeance (upon themselves, apparently). They’ve literally tried to use their yoga practice to alter their entire physiognomy. I have witnessed this miracle of modern alchemy up close. Sensing that their original shape and form was somehow lacking in Aryan “perfection,” they’ve done what amounts to a complete makeover.
It’s as if Dr. Frankenstein got a hold of a copy of “Our Bodies, Our Selves” and decided to use it as a body sculpting handbook.
Witness the contemporary – but largely unremarked – obsession with “Yoga Butt.” Like the search for the perfect wave, which may never be found, the quest for the perfect ass is relentless and elusive – and in the end – no pun intended – can prove painfully self-defeating.
It’s also the perfect dodge. The same yoginis who wouldn’t dream of shooting themselves up with Botox or “going under the knife” to pay for expensive cosmetic surgery think it’s perfectly acceptable to re-engineer the shape and look of their derriéres through zealous “all-natural” means.
In fact, the practice of intensively toning the “glutes” can strain other muscles, and even cause serious injury. And while it’s arguably safer than a nose or boob job, psychologically, it’s still a dangerously self-obsessive practice. And make no mistake: the Yoga Butt obsession can last years.
When it comes to most aspects of daily life, the Yoga Butt mavens may publically extol the principles espoused in the Yoga Sutras: self-acceptance, authenticity, and truthfulness. Yet, when it comes to Yoga Butt, the embrace of Hindu scripture is far less, well, “pat-and-jolly.”
But, that’s just it, ladies. Even on aesthetic grounds, Yoga Butt is distinctly over-rated. Oh, it’s shapely alright, in a distinctly globular sense, much as some modern silicone breasts are. But upon inspection, these power orbs are maybe just a little too shapely.
In fact, after multiple viewings, on different bodies, they all start to look pretty much the same.
Yoga Butt, I think I love you? NOT.
Indeed, even a cute and perky novelty item like Yoga Butt eventually becomes boring. Yoga Butt doesn’t move, let alone jiggle. She doesn’t dance. She just sits there and tries to look pretty. She’s the Barbie doll of bums. She’s an asana unto herself.
Yoga Butt may announce herself with great fanfare, but it turns out she has nothing of great consequence to say. She projects power — but exhibits no real majesty, let alone authority. Compared to your other body parts, she’s a total newbie. She lacks real life experience and the gravitas and wisdom that come with it. You don’t want to worship Yoga Butt – let alone caress her. You’re afraid she might bite, and you prefer to avoid her. While to the the bearer she may look and feel like the real thing, to the viewer, she’s just another shiny heiny.
Why do we need Yoga Butt to begin with? Beats the glucose out of me. Call me old school, but if yoga’s truly about self-acceptance, how come so many otherwise thoughtful yoginis have such a strong urge to shift their gift?
Some people blame it on the Beauty Myth. Slim is just in, right? Wrong. Much of the beauty myth is just that: a myth. These days the hottest females in and out of Hollywood exhibit the most sprawling and bodacious rear-ends. In fact, prior to the thin craze of the 1980s and 1990s, America the “Booti-ful” was practically our second national anthem. Despite the occasional Twiggy-style model, most of the bombshells and screen sirens of yesteryear were packing serious HEAT — downstairs AND up.
Italian film goddess Sophia Loren at her peak. No airbrush here. Mangia!
So, ladies, revel in your craftsmanship, if you must. We know how hard you’ve worked to forge those Buns of Steel. And they are a marvelous tribute to your yogic ingenuity — and to the emerging power of “ars-ana.” But rest assured: when you’re strolling along your favorite beach this summer, reveling in your newfound glory, you may turn a few heads. But most of us will be gawking elsewhere.
No ifs, glands – or butts – about it.
About Stewart Lawrence
Stewart J. Lawrence is a lifelong snoop, sneak, critic and scribe. He credits his Sephardic Jewish father for his affinity for the Spanish-speaking world, his poetic sensibilities, and his unflinching desire to speak truth to power. His mother, who largely raised him, did her best to endow her son with common sense, financial acumen, and a spirit of generosity toward his fellow man—largely to no avail. Stewart formally renounced the small, dull, grubby world of the bourgeois householder at age 50—and has no intention of turning back. When not navel gazing alone in perfect bliss under a Banyan tree, he contributes regular articles on Latino affairs, immigration, presidential politics, and yes, yoga, to the Guardian, Counterpunch, Huffington Post, the World and I, and the Los Angeles Times. He is co-author, with John Barton, of Four More Years: the Overwhelming Case for President Obama’s Second Term (forthcoming, June 2012). You can find his weekly musings at Huffington Post.
50 Comments !
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C init says:
So afraid to be the first comment. I mostly love this post, except the part where you turn around and affirm a different kind of butt. (The bodacious packing heat butt.)
I eat like a pregnant horse and pack a little pooch just so I can retain some semblance of body fat. I am intentionally not skinny, but am often called skinny. I have learned to embrace my body, and accept it. I’m finding the pendulum swinging…yay that we don’t all have to be Twiggy, yay that the yoga-butt may have had its day in the sun, but must you then tell me there is still a bar I will never reach? I could gain 50 pounds and still not have the sprawling backside you seem to be endorsing. It’s genetics. Did I misunderstand you? Because I really like the beginning of this post, and your appreciation of the real female body.
Leah says:
I thought this too! If yoga’s all about self-acceptance why should I care whether or not YOU like my figure at all?
Stewart Lawrence says:
HI Leah, thanks.
Well, you shouldn’t care — unless you’re TRYING to make me or anyone else care?
I find women – or men for that matter – are of two minds here. Often trying to get to a place of complete self acceptance, but then doing their best to project a certian look or body image to others, even as they tell themselves and others, no no, this is just for my own self-satisfaction — which it’s clearly not?
Men are often dumbfounded by women who spend an enormous amount of time “looking good,” to say nothing of wearing open blouses, skirts cut to their crack, exposed thongs, and then resenting the attention they get – much of it highly “appreciative” of the very things they’re projecting, wittiingly or not.
There are also real cultural differences here? I live in Washington, DC. It’s interesting – a lot of my older white women friends with ample backsides get A LOT of attention from Black men that they will never get from White men. Their arse is part of their appeal, and they know it! They’re not fat, they’re PHAT.
And in general, I can tell you, if I comment on a Black woman’s appearance, she will usually be very happy, while a snooty white woman – they’re almost all snooty here – might be tempted to call the police. I’m not exaggerating. Many of us guys just treat white women on the street, especially downtown, like they’re robots. Unless they show real signs of human life.
Why do you dress the way that you do? Why dress up at all? Why wear make-up?
Why do we do anything? Do we really not care? I think we do – obsessively in this culture.
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And there are many people who think it’s very healthy in fact. Beauty, they say, like fashion, are important to maintain. They view it almost in spiritual terms as a gift that should not be wasted? Everyone, they think should amp up as much as possible? For the sake of ART, for the Gods of Beauty!
How many times do people say, wow, that girl or that guy is great – too bad he doesn’t know how to dress. Women pay inordinate amount of attention to the smallest details of a guy’s appearance, like it’s a friggin’ Da Vinci code. And as soon as a woman they don’t know walks into a room, some part of them is spontaneously doing the dozens on her. It’s not a stereotype, right?
Again, re: culture? Some of the beauty standard shifts we’re seeing now have A LOT to do with the growing prominence of celebrity women who are “minorities” – J. Lo might have started it but now the floodgates are open – Beyonce, Kim Kardashian, Dee Lish, you name it?
Anywho, be all you can be , in any way you see fit, I say. It’s pretty easy to tell when people are really being themselves. The problem with Yoga Butt, perhaps, is that it tends to reveal the obsessive over-eager hand of the “craftsman” – and that sends a certain “signal,” too. Like too much make-up, perhaps.
Different strokes, though.
VQ2 says:
Yeah, I get what you’re saying. The propensity to get “yoga butt” which could be dormant in some young white women, can look out-of-place and contrived if achieved. It’s so out of place!
Leah says:
What a thorough reply! I saw your point from the beginning, and you’re right about how yoga butt can often be the product of over-eager, overly obsessive women trying to manipulate an otherwise perfectly fine form. I think there are a few components to my reply. One, some women feels the need to tighten and tone before they fully accept their body and that is their prerogative. Rigorous forms of yoga like Ashtanga will certainly help in that pursuit. Second, I think you dance a fine line when essentially saying, “a firm yoga figure isn’t my thing and I hang out with people who feel the same…so to attract someone like me or my friends, try to look like the gorgeous, curvy starlets of the past like Marilyn Monroe or Sophia Loren.” You probably speak for the majority of men in your demographic but you don’t represent all men. What’s more important than the figure is the woman who carries her figure with confidence, poise and grace…and since I come from yoga in the South (far…
Stewart Lawrence says:
Thanks for commenting! Certainly wasn’t trying to offend you.
I was considered thin and short for most of my life, and now I look like an aging rugby player. And love it. Every time I think about deliberately losing weight, I change my mind. I think of the chubby Buddha and smile.
Beauty is only skin deep, of course, but try telling that to your Grrrl Power yoga teacher these days? LOL
This is America where self-improvement tends to morph into self-advancement, self-promotion, self-aggrandizement, and self-satisfaction pretty quickly.
Ego pervades every pursuit in our culture. Unless there is a lot of conscious vigilance, and collective accountability, and a sense of deep conscience – and frankly, I see virtually none of that in today’s yoga world. It’s really the law of the jungle.
It’s just that the animals tend to be rather clueless and toothless compared to the predators in the larger culture. On the whole.
I really was just poking fun at the Yoga Butt mavens who are convinced that they have arrived at the Nirvanic Temple of the Holy Arse. That tourist trap isn’t open in my neighborhood?
C init says:
Hey, thanks for response. I can totally get behind you poking fun. You’re right, beauty is only skin deep, and I’m a big fan of balance!
Stewart Lawrence says:
Cinit – I was talking to the editors before you posted about whether any woman in her right mind would post on an article about the female body written by a guy, especially one as opinionated as me. So kudos to you. And yes, I agree with you. There is no other bar. That’s perhaps why the obsession is surprising. Some toning is surely good for you, why not, and looking good and feeling good, in moderation, is totally cool. But this is WAY beyond ALL THAT. Yoga Butt isn’t about self-esteem.
it’s actually primarily about power, I think, though it’s also a disguised “anorexia,” operating on the spiritual plane, more than physically. I do consider it scary, quite frankly, and a reflection of the way yoga is trending.
Love to hear what others think, though.
Stewart Lawrence says:
Happened to come across this – reminded me of your comment!
)
http://www.thinkbaby.co.uk/celebrity/pregnant-victoria-beckham-eats-like-a-horse-says-gordon-ramsay/4492.html
Cheers !
Stewart Lawrence says:
Cinit –
I came across this story by chance, and was reminded of your remark, which I had never really heard before (eat like a horse, yes, a pregnant horse, no)
http://www.thinkbaby.co.uk/celebrity/pregnant-victoria-beckham-eats-like-a-horse-says-gordon-ramsay/4492.html
Cheers!
))) STewart
VQ2 says:
There must be a different definition of “Yoga Butt” than the one I’ve heard and had–numerous painful times. Literally a really bad–can’t sit down bad–pain in the ass that you get from doing too much downdog and dolphin without engaging your bandhas.
As far as the kind you describe, I’m afraid genetics has me squarely in the category of not being able to get one that sticks out like that unless I’m seriously obese at the time of possession … kind of the way C init says …
Stewart Lawrence says:
VQ2 – Yes, I’ve heard that. But I have never heard of a guy suffering from it. Have you? Why is that?
VQ2 says:
It’s Sadie Nardini’s coinage. Somehow that sense of the term was adopted by us suffering with it, who are in the front of the room while the future yoga rockstars have their (sometimes other kind of) yoga butts floating in the air in the back of the room.
Child’s pose has been discouraged in vinyasa classes in the studio since 1999, although I couldn’t speak for Sadie’s classes since I’ve never been to one or anything like that …
Glad I escaped that kind of hell!
Stewart Lawrence says:
Why would child’s pose be discouraged? Really? Too sedentary? Mush, dammit!
Stewart Lawrence says:
For what it’s worth –
Two best versions of Radio Head’s “Creep” I have ever heard.
The Pretenders (Chrissie Hynde, incredible)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lML2N4xB9GU
Carrie Manalakos (live at a club three weeks ago, went viral)
http://www.viralviralvideos.com/2012/04/23/carrie-manolakos-covers-creep-by-radiohead/
Singing about raw, existential, self-deprecating despair isn’t popular, but it’s real, and it underpins a lot of pathologies, including guru worship, and the turning of anything, your body, or even just your butt, into an icon for “worship”.
Only the Divine Presence deserves worship? The rest shrivels and dies, sooner than you think.
Peace all. xoxo
melimelo says:
Wow – the fact that good writers spend that much energy discussing the shape of other people’s butts may be a sign that there is something rotten in the kingdom of yoga. Seriously, appreciate (or not) other people’s butts all you want, but can a butt shape really be a sign of the times? I doubt it… Incidentally, if you are genetically that way predisposed and do lots of yoga, you will end up with a yoga butt, whether you want to or not. So similarly to “do not judge a book by its cover”, it might be useful to refrain from judging a woman by the shape of her butt. Talking to her would, I’m sure, give you a better idea of how much time she actually spends thinking about a part of her body that she rarely gets to see. Hooray for healthy happy butts and for other people minding their own “buttness”.
Stewart Lawrence says:
Testy, eh? Actually what you wrote is completely absurd given how much people, especially women, agonize over their body image and their butt and everything else? You’re kidding right? Talked to women? I’ve lived with 3 in my time,
one for 10 years. Mind-boggling.
Everyone who does yoga ends up with yoga butt? That’s totally ridiculous, I mean really. If you believe that, you don’t know yoga – and the various ways of practicing – and you certainly don’t know butts. Do you have one?
The real issue is why you want to minimize this issue. I’m sure you have your reasons. I’ll leave those to you.
Here’s Denise Austin on what it takes —
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iuPEUaV5hk
“Squeeze it, squeeze it, tighten the tush, now little pulses. Pulse, pulse. Let’s work on the back cheek, right there, good. Challenge yourself! Isolate the muscle. Really target it. Switch legs! Ready. Up, then down. Think about that derriere. They’re small movements, but oh so important. Feel good about yourself. Think about that mini-skirt. How to get those hot buns. Not cinnamon buns but these!”
Shit, she’s hot. I may have to start!
melimelo says:
Of course, I don’t have a butt, I don’t do yoga, and I’m not a woman, so I must defer to your highest analysis of all these issues. By the way, I never said that (a) women don’t care about their butts, (b) doing yoga = getting a yoga butt. This is really making me laugh now. I liked reading your article but why do you care how women relate to their butts, yoga or not?
Stewart Lawrence says:
I don’t actually care that much. I just see it as part of a certain syndrome within the yoga world, which is quite clear from the article. I mean really, Mel. Uh, now you’re making me laugh. You don ‘t have to agree, actually I would expect more argument — but it’s as if you didn’t even read the article, which really isn’t about butts. It’s about whether yoga culture engenders the self-acceptance and spiritual awareness it claims, and that many people want, or whether in the hands of some, at least, it is engendering its own unhealthy beauty myths and encouraging body fetishism, self-punishment, and self obsession.
Rocko says:
If you don’t focus on your ass, well.
http://pinterest.com/pin/563018673727589/
Stewart Lawrence says:
Funny. It looks like you’ve uncovered the unstated Yoga Butt mantra: “If you don’t focus on your ass, no one will.” It’s not actually true, that’s the thing. They may or may not – they not even care. You know what’s funny? How much women focus on the male ass, even more than we do. A lot of women wish men would tone their asses more. I love it.
Nickie says:
I see the banter here and appreciate the different opinions and views. But, in this post I found gold…. “Yoga Butt may announce herself with great fanfare, but it turns out she has nothing of great consequence to say. She projects power — but exhibits no real majesty, let alone authority.” Even if I hated your article (which I totally don’t) you’ve got style my friend. Thanks for the post.
Nadine Fawell says:
Love it! My (jiggly) yoga butt thanks you…
Not that I have any issues with tight asses. I’d love one, if the genetic lottery had played out that way for me
Stewart Lawrence says:
Cool Nadine! I’ve enjoyed your articles. They even make me jiggle. Stewart
Bruce says:
I must admit I have always viewed the term “Yoga Butt” as a metaphor that refers to someone who only has an interest in the cosmetic value of doing Yoga, whether it be the butt or any other part of the anatomy.
People like that are pretty easy to pick, they normally blow the joint as soon as it’s time for relaxation or meditation, and normally show little/no respect for the teacher or other students.
They typically wear the latest trendy gear designed to show off their assets for maximum effect and if there is a mirror in the studio they will normally sit right in front of it so they can check themselves out during the entire class
Not that there is anything wrong with enjoying better self-esteem that comes from a healthy Yoga body but it’s just part of the overall package, if that is all you are going for the beauty of your most important asset (your soul) is left to rot
Den says:
I’ve like a lot of Stewart Lawrence’s writing, here and on places like Huffington Post. But man, every time I’m just about to get in the groove of what he says and then give out a cyber high five, what reads like not-so latent misogyny starts to creep in.
It creeps into comments (“Men are often dumbfounded by women who spend an enormous amount of time ‘looking good’, to say nothing of wearing open blouses, skirts cut to their crack, exposed thongs, and then resenting the attention they get” — said by a man who doesn’t seem to realise that women might want to please themselves or, gasp!, other women, and don’t just do everything to dumbfound the straight male gaze).
It creeps into the tone of responses (“You’re kidding right? Talked to women? I’ve lived with 3 in my time, one for 10 years. Mind-boggling.”).
And then we see how a commenter (whom it can be fairly presumed is a woman) when she disagrees with one or two authoritatively stated points or pronouncements gets responded to (“Testy, eh?”)
So, yeah, I generally liked the thrust of the article, but then we get to the comments section and Stewart, you begin a war of attrition on my sensibilities and I begin to seriously distrust your overall intent. It begins to just creep me out, to be honest.
Anyway, I’m sure I’ll hear an earful for all that but there you go. My opinion on the opinions for what it’s worth.
HJCOTTON says:
What is worse than a yoga butt is all the detox, juicing and fasting that is taking place in the yoga world. Instead of eating a sensible Satvic diet, most of the yoginis go to extremes to achieve the perfect thinness. Yogis are becoming worse tthan models and Ballet dancers.
VQ2 says:
…yeah, and for what?
To chase an elusive aesthetic ideal that should not be associated with the healing yogic arts in the first place.
Lest anybody think yoga is just a workout or a weight control plan.
Or, in my case, having spent loads of time in reclined meditation … and arriving from the other extreme … thinking that yoga as it is popularly practiced today, will actually “center” me … perhaps if I were extremely hyperactive, young and a Type-A it might, occasionally …
Stewart Lawrence says:
I have periodically referred to American yoga as a “New Age modeling clan,” which tends to bring out the long knives in a hurry. And the intensely competitive, psychologically troubled “Black Swan” of ballet? She’s here, too. Yoga’s become quite the pathology parade.
Any one can come to yoga to try to work out his or her issues, but you really shouldn’t teach if you’re still a head case, and at 25, almost by definition you are. I blame the studio owners, who are desperate to keep their doors open, and have no meaningful entrance or curricular standards. 30 students at $3,000-$4,000 a pop? Too tempting, it doesn’t take much, and no one fails, either.
People would much rather run around and blame the John Friends of the world, and for what? Being an entrepreneur? But if you start raising systemic or institutional issues that affect the very people criticizing him — IN SPADES — no one has anything t say. Reform yoga? Take teacher-training away from the…
Laura says:
i liked a few lines here and there, but when i finished reading the article, and i started thinking at the overall tone, i couldn’t avoid feeling objectified.
Stewart likes a particular type of body, fair enough, but why would an hour-glass body with a flabby butt be better than a thin and firm one? It’s not as if people can dramatically change their body type with yoga. Using certain muscles will inevitably tone them. When i cycled to work (20 km a day) i had muscular quads and calves. it was a consequence, not the reason why i commuted by bike.
So, what has this got to do with yoga? To tone your butt i can think of far more effective ways than doing yoga.
Actually i had a firmer butt when i was swimming everyday. And no, i didn’t take up swimming (or yoga for that matter) because i was unhappy with my butt. Yoga hasn’t made a visible difference to the size of my backside, because it has always been small. It’s called genetics, dude! My mum is a couch potato and at age 70 her butt is still small.
Do we give a toss? if we agonised after a J-lo butt, then we would have a problem! Luckily we accept our body the way it is and hang out with men (evolved men?) who don’t focus on our body parts.
PS. Women who suffer from anorexia and bulimia usually have a distorted image of their bodies, emotional issues, family issues etc, what has yoga got to do with it?
Laura says:
excuse my sloppy editing…it should read ‘thinking of’ and ‘agonise over’
Stewart Lawrence says:
Laura –
Thanks. A lot of the big butt hype was really me just being “cheeky” (literally). And to poke fun at some yoga teachers who are indeed, I think, incredibly obsessed with the shape of their buns, and who seem to think they have reached a better place as a result of all their extreme body sculpting work?
I don’t think I was objectifying the body, but I am sorry that you took it that way, or if I did, that I did. I actually think the women involved are totally objectifying their bodies – and rationalizing it as a form beauty-enhancement, and personal mastery and self-empowerment.
In my own mind, I was really just saying, more for humor purposes, well, you guys think you have such great buns now? W ell, I, like a lot of others, happen to like bigger flabbier all-natural buns! In fact, buns a lot like the ones you just left behind!
In fact, I don’t care what buns people have. I really don’t. It’s nice if we can share something of genuine importance from our interior worlds. I do find that people who focus on their appearance to this degree, as I once did, lose contact with their ability to share more fully from their interior space.
Again, nothing wrong with “looking good and feeling good” – but in this obsession, I detect something else that’s actually pretty scary.
And I do find it unseemly – if not hypocritical – when such women are yoga teachers, extolling the virtues of “self-acceptance,” and body self-acceptance, specifically, after practicing so little of it themselves, and literally flaunting their new and improved forms while they teach. Talk about ugly.
This not about a little toning. This is about conducting what amounts to a complete body makeover through extreme yoga, dieting and other techniques. The people involved do NOT have the same forms they had before – and it’s sad, I think, because really they were far more loving, humble, and self-accepting people before they got so self-obsessed — and had more to genuinely “teach.”
Maybe I am the only person who sees this development to this extreme degree. It’s present in one degree or another in yoga culture generally. Just look at Yoga Journal and the extremely narrow range of bodies deemed yoga-beautiful. Usually around this time in yoga class, the spring, the teacher start talking about getting your butt ready for summer, etc. Again, who’s doing the objectifying?
I think the women participating in this phenomenon, to this degree, have just bought into it, and they think that becoming a hot shot yoga teacher means becoming “iconic” – especially, physically. It’s like dancers and models who who are under pressure to reach a certain weight, or they know will be dropped. Ironically, no such pressure exists in the yoga world – not really.
The last part of your comment. I think anorexia and bulimia and yoga are closely connected because so many people come to yoga with real body image issues, no matter what their shape is, and they look to yoga as a way of embracing and loving their bodies again. I have certainly had that experience myself. But that’s precisely why the yoga butt mavens may or may not be setting such a good example.
Stewart Lawrence says:
Den –
No sweat. I like who I am, though. Take what you like and leave the rest?
I do think that in this day and age, we now live with a double standard. Any criticism of the female gender’s foibles is now suddenly “misogynist” while any criticism of male foibles is well, “fun,” if not altogether, “righteous.”
I don’t think anything I said, from the mouth of a woman, would be considered offensive in the slightest. And if I like you, deigned to criticize a woman for referring in her comments to her three relationships, as evidence that she knew something about male foibles, I would be laughed off the blog and told to “get over it.”
Yes, it’s the modern double standard.
The fact that some women have convinced you otherwise to me is simply testament to the gender imbalances that we live with today, which are almost as bad as the ones that women insist that they are still fighting against.
(Note: I didn’t actually say you are pussy-whipped, Bro).
In case you hadn’t noticed, men ROCK, TOTALLY, just as much as women do. We always have — so why do you let women shame you into thinking otherwise? I’m proud to be a man. I expect – or at least hope – that women are proud to be women. Vive la difference!
Peace, man, thanks for sharing your comments. Stewart
P.S. “Male gaze”? Ever thought about what the “female gaze” is? Hint: It’s not in the feminist literature you’ve been reading. It’s just in daily life. Cheers.
Den says:
Stewart: “(Note: I didn’t actually say you are pussy-whipped, Bro)…. In case you hadn’t noticed, men ROCK, TOTALLY, just as much as women do. We always have — so why do you let women shame you into thinking otherwise?”
Whew. Presume much, Stewart? Where did I say I was a man?
Your comment, the tone, etc., in my humble (or not) opinion, really only proves my point.
But whatever. You’re hardly an enemy of discourse and free thought, so no more from me.
Peace, Bro
Stewart Lawrence says:
It doesn’t “prove” anything, except that Stewart is Stewart and Den is Den. Probably just as God and Shiva intended. My suggestion? Stop reading what I write if it offends you so? Seriously! I would, if I felt the way you do. Peace, Sis/Bro/Mom/Dad
Den says:
Stewart, no need to get so defensive. I never said you ‘offended me so’. I do recall applauding what I like about your writing. But I also pointed out what I see as some plain truths that I hoped you’d take on board about how some of what you say is perceived by some of those who read you. That is all. Take it in the spirit it was intended, or not. As you will.
Stewart Lawrence says:
Not defensive. I’m just too busy being me. I urge you to be you, and to leave it at that? Seriously, man. I don’t want to offend you, either, but trust me when I say that your comments have no effect on how I express myself. And I mean that from the depths of my soul. Peace, Den
Joe says:
” I’m just too busy being me”
I think we’ve all figured that out.
Den says:
Sure, okay, Stewart. But honest discussion rather than passive agressive argumentative tactics would have been a more worthy way to pull this back-and-forth to a close. Why suggest I am not being myself – what evidence do you have of that? Why continue to suggest I’m male (and, as you previously suggested, ‘pussy whipped’ and thereby inauthentically male?) when I’ve indicated I’m not? (Den is short for Denise, even though you didn’t ask) And it is a shame that nothing I (or anyone?) can say affects you. I’ve always believed we’re here to have some affect on one another, hopefully positively. That’s all part of human interaction. Otherwise it’s not a conversation; it’s just one-way pontificating. I do hope you are wrong and that some of what I and others have had to say does influence you somehow. You’re a persuasive and good writer. Just a shame to see all the other muck get thrown in, is all I was trying to point out.
Rhonda says:
OMG
I stopped teaching yoga a ‘gyms/clubs’ due the the ‘competitiveness’ of how everyone looks. Geared up in the latest ‘yoga-butt’ pants showing off – missing the point of yoga as far as my teachings had me believe. So I left – the gyms/clubs – and now enjoy bliss of teaching men & women…
Stewart Lawrence says:
Rhonda — I started doing yoga at the YMCA in the 1990s, and the teacher there remains the best I’ve ever had. She was a very roly-poly (obese, in fact ) 62 year old German woman named Sita (of course). She’d been practicing yoga since she was 9! The most flexible and spiritually strict and centered yoga teacher I have ever worked with. Bar none.
I think it may be something of a myth that “gym” yoga is inferior by nature to “studio” yoga? A lot of purists like to think so, but here’s what I have actually found. The level of professionalism in gyms is actually higher. So is the accessibility of the style and presentation. That doesn’t necessarily mean that the gym-based yoga is all “fitness-oriented.”
By contrast, the studio-based yoga is actually far LESS professional. The teachers often came up through the ranks of the studio’s own teacher training programs – and there’s a lot of incestuous nepotism at work. Also, there’s pressure to spout the…
VQ2 says:
I do quite a better job with yoga practicing in my own manner; and with dvds and online downloads than I’ve done with about 4 of the 5 studios I’ve been to. The fifth is closing its doors very soon.
Both serving as an influence to my home practice and catalyst for my migrating to a studio was gym-centric Beth Shaw’s YogaFit system. When the objective is getting centered, the studio has a lot of flash that attracts [like bright and shiny objects alongside the road] but the main objective is getting CENTERED in a SUSTAINABLE practice [like the actual light at the end of the dark night].
In addition, more expensive is not necessarily better. You pay for the bells, whistles and the quieter, less frantic atmosphere – and practically everyone staying for savasana.
Trouble is, gymgoers know this, and so the gym yoga classes were too crowded. And I do not have time to get there; nor at that certain time – when the classic Stairmaster they still had not trashed in favor of…
VQ2 says:
… was unoccupied …
[This is not counting their pool, weights, etc. ...]
Stewart Lawrence says:
Good article on how
“Everyone Needs to Relax About Their Butts.”
http://www.ivillage.com/everybody-needs-relax-about-their-butts/4-a-323657
About the extreme degrees to which women are going to manufacture the perfect butt. “Women are literally putting their lives at risk,” like the 20 year old model who injected herself with a butt-enhancing drug and died when it seeped into her bloodstream.
Excerpt:
“What we really need to do is stop debating the butt issue and instead, take a step back and ask how we can stop perpetuating such unrealistic beauty standards. We keep creating these thinner/tighter/better messages, taking what could have been a perfectly lovely “hey it’s okay to be curvy” trend and turning it into something impossible and wrong.
So, start by giving your butt a break.”
recoveringyogi says:
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JJ says:
“Hey Ladies, stop worrying about your bodies, I love big butts!” What a pandering, patronizing article.this is… you sound like a lounge lizard…
lisa says:
This is one of the most ridiculous and misogynist pieces of writing I’ve ever seen on a yoga blog (I include your comments in this as well).
Are you seriously criticizing women (or is it just white women) for rebuffing the incessant stream of commentary on their bodies delivered daily by men on the street while failing to understand that such insistent reminders of the fact that our bodies are constantly on display and treated as though they are consumable items that any man is free to judge simply because he crosses our paths can create for even the most level-headed of women a body anxiety that propels us to sometimes act in ways to manipulate our bodies?
And for the record (since you asked) when I get dressed and go “downtown” I’m getting dressed in a way that is pleasing to me, not to try to attract any more of the unceasing male gaze. Call me “snooty” for not appreciating the never-ending remarks on what men think about how I look at a given moment in time but I think the real question is why men feel so free to make judgments on what women do with and how they present their bodies.
Such insecure girls says:
These women are so insecure. Say anything in their direction any less fawning than “You are a goddess and princess and everything you do is parfait, and do you look thinner today?” and they f-r-e-a-k- out. I think you’ve just learned Thou Shalt Not Challenge White Women. Lol. They’re exactly why women of color stay away from yoga studios. I do my asanas at home. No comparisons, no bitchiness, no hostile cold stares.
Way to miss the entire point (as usual) about what a spiritual practice invented by brown skinned people is all about, ladies. Stewart is right. Shut up and stretch.
Stewart Lawrence says:
I think you mean a Yoga Butt.
VQ2 says:
I didn’t mean in favor of a Yoga Butt at all … I mean in favor of that aging piece of equipment [that Stairmaster that had had my name on it] breaking down and justifying the gym’s throwing it out.
Some of us (former) cardio queens have had arthritic knees and bad feet and need the old equipment that has some give …
The comment window cut off my response and then I forgot it in the continuation … (because I was at work .. a job that has not much to do with the sounds of me keying in complete sentencelike strings …)